Wait on God's Perfect Timing

I just started my first ever Skypleship meeting last Friday. This is an online discipleship group (or DGroup) meeting via a Skype conference for the purpose of studying God's word, fellowship, prayer, mutual support and accountability. The people we connect with around the globe regardless of religious background are those who want to study God's word where it's impossible in the country or area they are in, or they have limited access to churches.

God gave me the best birthday present last June when he gave me my first ever member after months of waiting. God made me wait. I applied to be a Skypleship leader November last year. My application was processed January this year, application approved last May and my first ever member seek me on the day of my birthday. His timing is indeed very perfect. He didn't allow me to start leading my own group until he found my heart ready to do so, not until I was equipped as I only finished my training under Global Leadership Center last May and not until it was already God's timing. But this will not happen have I not heeded God's call and obeyed to his leading through my daily quiet times studying his word and through God's grace.

This verse from the bible reminded me to wait upon God's perfect time. For the vision is yet for an appointed time and it hastens to the end [fulfillment]; it will not deceive or disappoint. Though it tarry, wait [earnestly] for it, because it will surely come; it will not be behindhand on its appointed day. (Habakkuk 2:3)

Another perfectly timed moment God endowed us with is being part of the Family Ministry. My husband and I had this desire to attend the Family and Finance seminar but we made a list of confirmations from the Lord before finalizing our decision to do so. I almost bought a ticket in haste after a church service just to grab the early bird rate. But ended up submitting to my husband's request to wait a little bit more. To our delight, I received an SMS after three days inviting us to facilitate the Family and Finance big event. Of course I got so thrilled and excited since this kind of confirmation was clearly given to us. And to top it all, our ticket for the event was sponsored by a very kind and generous couple. The reward of obeying God to submit to our husbands. God is not just amazing but also full of pleasant surprises.

After the event, we will also have the chance to minister our own couple's dgroup which they called "SaturDATES" where we will meet every Saturdays. Little did I know that my husband has been praying for this kind of ministry because he was unable to join me in my Skypleship ministry due to time constraints at work. Why God lead us to the Family and Finance branch of the Family Ministry is for us to know soon. But I have a strong inkling that God will use our not so good and good experiences we previously had on handling finances as a couple.

So if we sometimes feel impatient about God not answering our prayers nor is experiencing a seemingly dead end at our circumstances, let's always be reminded that God is a loving God and is faithful to his promises. As the song goes, "Trust and obey, for there's no other way." So let us wait patiently for the Lord.

Wait patiently for the LORD. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the LORD. (Psalm 27:14 )

Visit http://www.familyandfinance.org/ to know more and
register in the event

See you at the Family and Finance seminar!

My Greatest Fear

When I was a pre-schooler, my greatest fear was to be away from my parents especially my mother. But when I was sent to stay in my grandparent's house to study elementary, which is an hour drive from our home from the city, I was able to overcome that fear.

When I graduated from high-school, I again faced another greatest fear in my life because it was unplanned that I'll study college in Manila, very far away from my family and without any friends in the new school environment. But that fear vanished when I was able to adjust to Manila-life for a couple of years and gained some true friends who helped me coped up with the difficulties and challenges.

The next greatest fear that posed when I was an adult is to bear a child. I'm afraid of needles, I was never hospitalized, my threshold of pain is very low and I really couldn't imagine myself carrying a baby in my womb for 9 months. And the process of how the child would be delivered normally or via cesarean birth is truly an unbearable sight and thought for me. But then again, when I gave birth to our two daughters, I was able to successfully conquer my greatest fear twice.

As the saying goes, "What does not kill you makes you stronger.", I thought I now can face whatever fearful incidents that will come my way. That was my mindset when I was living a "self-centered", 'self-directed", "self-seeking" and "egotistic" life. I may struggle to face my fears but with my own wit and capacity, I'm confident that I can conquer it.

When I surrendered my life to Jesus and accepted him as my personal savior, my true being, as what the creator has designed me for, was exposed right to my very eye. Jesus is the vine and I am the branch, apart from him I can do nothing nor I bear much fruit (John 15:5). I will be useless as soon as all the material things, fortune and credentials no longer buy me peace of mind, happiness, contentment and most of all, my salvation. These things just feed the monster of  "greatest fears". Yes, before living a Christ-centered life, I'm afraid of losing my job, the identity I carry in the corporate world, my sources of income, my husband, my children and all the material things I possess. I know about the story of Job in the bible, I just admired him and I don't want to be like him. That was my old self.

Being transformed by Christ, I thought I am now living a fearless life. God has full of promises in the scriptures, and being a faithful God, I know he would never forsake me and that I could totally place my whole life under his sovereign care. Not until I learned about his nature in Exodus 33:1-4 on the first day of our church's Mid-year Prayer and Fasting.

1 Then the Lord said to Moses, “Leave this place, you and the people you brought up out of Egypt, and go up to the land I promised on oath to Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, saying, ‘I will give it to your descendants.’ 2 I will send an angel before you and drive out the Canaanites, Amorites, Hittites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites. 3 Go up to the land flowing with milk and honey. But I will not go with you, because you are a stiff-necked people and I might destroy you on the way.” 4 When the people heard these distressing words, they began to mourn and no one put on any ornaments.

God promised the Israelites an angel drive out their enemies. He promised them blessings and favor by letting them enter the promised land, flowing with milk and honey. But the scariest part is, God will leave them, they'll not have his presence.

Never in my life I came face to face with a realistic and very serious fear, that made my knees weak and my heart bleed of its thought. I FEAR GOD WILL LEAVE ME.

God might leave me because...
     - I am very focused on my petitions and prayer requests
     - I preferred to pursue after the blessings and gifts
     - I am so occupied equipping myself with God's word
     - I became too busy with my ministry and discipling our kids through homeschooling
that I neglect to nurture and didn't remain steadfastly in fellowship with God.

When the Holy Spirit sent me this message, I cried so hard, like a girl whose boyfriend just broke up with her, or a wife permanently left by her husband or a mother who lost a child. Deep in my heart I cried, "Take everything I have that hinders my relationship with you but never leave me, my God! For I am just a useless speck of dust without you. I need you in my life!"

As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God. (Psalm 42:1)

How about you, what's your greatest fear?

The Road Less Traveled

If there is one thing to answer the person asking how I am or how have I been doing lately, the answer is: "I'm on DETOUR!". The areas in my life where I assumingly took total control of before are now suddenly leading to roads I never thought I would be travelling. The journey I never dreamed of trekking but it's a sweet and exciting ride. This started last year, when I surrendered my life to God and accepted Jesus as my personal Lord and savior.

Having a background in engineering, I totally agree in the premise that the shortest distance between two points is a straight line. It is in this logical thinking my life was patterned after. Taking control is very easy because a simple logic of "if-then-else" condition (if-"you do this" then-"you get this" else-"otherwise") makes a great pattern to achieve whatever I want.

However, in God's economy, the shortest distance between two points is a not a straight path (by the way how God took the Israelites out of Egypt to the promised land in the book of Exodus). When I came to know about this concept, I learned more about God's character and how obedience, patience and trust play an important role.

God paved my way to detour....

A detour in my faith - from a solid Roman Catholic to a born-again Christian

A detour in my marriage - from being a proud, bossy and control-freak wife to a submissive wife

A detour in parenting - from sending our daughters to conventional school, we now homeschool them

A detour in my career - from a workaholic corporate employee  for almost 2 decades to entrepreneur and household manager

A detour in life's view - from defining success as having a stable high paying job, a complete family, having children, living in your own house, driving your own car to redefining success in life if we live each day becoming more Christ-like and participating in God's kingdom building.

I remember my favorite poem from Robert Frost. I love to read this whenever I make major life-changing decisions before.

The Road Not Taken

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I?
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

After I surrendered my life to Christ, I'm rooting myself with the scripture and the poem above could be related from this verse: "Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it." (Matthew 7:13-14)

The road not taken is definitely not appealing because when you let go and let God, he'll reform us into the likeness of his son, Jesus. The transformation process is very difficult for us humans. This difficulty will deceive us into thinking we have reason for wandering off God's path and our attitudes and habits have places us on the dangerous side-paths of the kingdom of "self".

All my life I have been living out of God's path, in the jungle of rebellion, lust, autonomy, greed, foolishness and self-focus. It's only through his restoring grace I was able to be on his track. Indeed, our savior guide, Jesus, doesn't leave us to our wandering. A good shepherd, he relentlessly seeks us and places us back on his designed path and I am deeply thankful and honored to be placed on detour because my life now is a far cry from from where it was before.